Most of us can utilize the life, executive, leadership, and personal transformational coaching that our new business and life coach columnist Angie McCourt offers. Here, she shares her insight on how we can embrace our true, stylish authenticity…in the office and beyond.
GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION
In my book, Love Your Gifts: Permission to Revolutionize Authenticity in the Workplace, I target the many limitations that can impact how we show up in the workplace as our authentic selves. These constraints can impact our elevated gifts and deter us from reaching our full potential. So, let’s see how to clear out what isn’t working, so we can activate these innate gifts.
The clearing out involves reducing and eventually eliminating judgments, comparisons, competing in unhealthy ways, limiting beliefs, overcompensating, and our inner critic. This also applies to our authenticity in personal relationships, with friends, the community, on social media, our spirituality, and within our families. In fact, if we are not feeling connected to our authentic selves, it may be causing a disconnect from our joy, which can affect our interactions with others or in a desire to be fully ourselves, speak our truth, show up in our authentic skin, and showcase our gifts and talents. It can also affect our style, taste in food, art, and décor in this drive to be our authentic selves.
We are often influenced by others, including friends, colleagues, and current trends, regarding what we should wear, eat, support, and appreciate. However, these areas are a great place to be your authentic self. Today many people wear clothes based on their mood, type of activity, or how they want to show up versus being influenced by others. We see fashion trends shifting everywhere compared to 10 to 20 years ago when they were very predictable.
Instead, many people today wear clothes based on their mood, type of activity, or how they want to show up versus being influenced by others. We listen to different types of music based on how we feel or want to feel. We view jewelry as symbolic and even as wearable art showcasing it according to how we wish to present ourselves. The style each of us has is becoming more about our individuality than how others expect us to be or how others are showing up. To be authentic is not to try to be different but to be in the truth of what you enjoy, doing what best represents who you are, your values, beliefs, and desires.
There is often a fear of judgment, rejection, or disapproval based on our status, job, title, or responsibilities that hold us back from being our authentic selves. Take a moment to think about the unique qualities you have and don’t share with others and ask yourself why not? This specialness might be a talent, interest, gift, or even a parenting role.
We struggle between sharing too much about ourselves out of fear this knowledge will be held against us somehow, which leads to unhappiness and disconnection. So, do what feels comfortable by allowing your authenticity to shine when you show up.
THE MAGIC OF THREES
Try these three exercises to allow yourself to break through the blocks that may be holding you back from bringing your authentic self into your everyday life.
- Assess your values (what are the top five values you live by today?) and fully align to them throughout all areas of your life.
- Discover two limiting beliefs restricting your authenticity (Example: You are expected to show up in a certain way, or others won’t respect you.) Challenge the truth of those beliefs. When has this happened in the past? What happens if the limiting beliefs are not accurate? Then, write your new truth statement.
- Stop comparing yourself to others. This can be easier said than done, and it takes self-awareness to catch when this is happening. Reducing time on social media can help. Be grateful for what you have, who you are, and who is in your life currently. Support others in their success, too.
Then, check in with yourself regularly to see how you connect with your authentic self and what that looks and feels like. Finally, acknowledge how your authenticity influences the impact you can make at home, work, in the community, and the world.